perhaps, be harder to bear for those who don't believe in an afterlife: "a secular mind searching for its lost love" has little idea where to look and an underlying suspicion that any consolations are contrived.
Meanwhile, the "brutally physiological" elements of mourning are no less present--the increase in stress hormones, the sleep and appetite disruptions, the weakening of the immune system, the palpitations, difficulty breathing, auditory or visual hallucinations--nor is grief any less obsessive: "With other people, with strangers, I count the hours until I can go be alone and get back to my secret preoccupation, my romance with my lost mother".
from The Irish Times: A fine last farewell
then PsychCentral: The Long Goodbye: A Memoir
then The Guardian: The Long Goodbye: A Memoir of Grief by Meghan O'Rourke--review
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